Love For Ashley

A few days ago, I overheard Ashley talking to one of the girls in her dance company. With dance auditions coming soon for the next year, the girls are asking each other if they are going to audition and stay in company. Dance Friend: "Ashley, are you going to audition next week" Ashley: "Yes, are you?" Dance Friend: "I don't know. I will probably audition but I don't know if I will stay in company or even dance at all. Ashley: "I'd just die if I didn't dance at all." "I have to dance, it gives me life." Dance Friend: "So you are going to stay in company?" Ashley: "I want too but my mom says that if I don't get at least three company routines, then I probably won't do company." "But I am not going to quit dancing, I have to dance, it's who I am." "It's all I know." Dance Friend: "Wow Ashley, you are serious maybe you should do a solo." Ashley: "I d

These two girls are members of the same dance company as Ashley. They are in the 5th grade and my son has a slight crush on the sister of one of the dancers in this video.

A proof of the cookbook arrived today and I could not be happier, the cookbook looks beautiful. With all of the trouble we have had with the cover of the cookbook, I was nervous about having it redone again for the third time by the people at Morris Press. They did a beautiful job. See for yourself.

Many people have asked us why we are raising funds now even though Ashley isn't listed for a transplant yet. First, let me say that we are raising funds now because we know that Ashley will need a liver transplant in the future. Honestly, we should have started raising funds for Ashley's medical care the day she was diagnosed at 6 weeks of age. Statistics are not in favor of Ashley living with her liver disease into adulthood. Statistics are not in favor of Ashley living through her teen years without a liver transplant. Therefore, we finally removed the denial curtain and let reality slap us in the face. It is because of research into Ashley's liver disease and conversations with her doctors that made us decide that fundraising was not only recommended but needed. Ashley will always require lifelong medical care even if she does beat the statistics. Our second reason for doing fundraising is the cost of medicine, from hospital visits, labs to outpatient procedures; th

Yesterday, I attended an awards ceremony in Ashley's 4 th grade class. Although, we haven't received Ashley's report card yet. She did receive an award for Excellent Effort, Outstanding Achievement in Math and Science and she received an award for being the Student with the Most Perseverance. Ashley's teacher almost made me cry while giving out the last award. She talked about how Ashley has overcome medical odds and medical issues; perservered through the struggles and maintained such a positive attitude. Ashley really has overcome so much in just 9 1/2 years; she is truly a remarkable child, I can only image what her future will bring. As the school year ends, I can't help but think about where Ashley will be in two years. She will be in 5 th grade next year; her last year of elementary school. I worry about Ashley's middle school years, I am not sure if keeping Ashley in the public school system is right for her. However, our budget cannot handle a private

I received an email from Morris Cookbooks regarding Ashley's cookbook, looks like the estimated delivery date for the cookbook is on or before July 7. This has taken a lot longer than I expected but we did run into some issues with the graphics. The cover of the cookbook had to be redone in-house. Which means the graphic department at Morris Cookbooks had to completely redo the cover, which also means that there was a price increase in the production of the cookbooks. Not only did the cover had to be redesigned but one of the tabbed index pages was missing in my original digital images that I sent the team at Morris Press. None of the issues surrounding the cookbook have been Morris' fault, it's been mine or my original graphic designer. Despite all the setbacks in getting this cookbook published, I am positive it will be a beautiful cookbook. My mom and I have been actively selling the cookbooks so that we can pay off the cost of publishing them; the cost is around $1400.

On this day 18 years ago, I married my best friend. Joey, I can't wait to see what the future has in store for us. I love you!

Yesterday, I took Ashley in for labs. We had them drawn at our local Quest Diagnostic Center. The people at Quest are great; it's a one stick kind of place. For those of us who have children that need frequent blood work, to find a place that can stick your child once with the needle is priceless. Since Ashley was a baby she has handled these frequent labs draws with such bravery and yesterday was no different. Here is the conversation we had while she was getting labs. Ashley: "Mommy, I can't feel the needle in my arm." "It doesn't even hurt and usually I feel a pinch." Me: "I think you are just getting use to it and it doesn't scare you anymore." Ashley: "No mommy, I am just numb to it or maybe the nerves in my arm don't work anymore." Me: "I think it's because you are a brave brave girl." Ashley: "No mommy, I am not brave; I have a numb arm." "I have been stuck with a needle in my arm

Cookbooks will be here in exactly 20 days but who is counting. Noone wants a cookbook, right? We have only been working on the cookbook, collecting recipes and entering them on the computer for the last 6 months, what is another 20 days of waiting. By the way, I have a new cookbook order form so if you haven't ordered your cookbook, please send me an email at Laurie@cfl.rr.com . Right now, if you order a cookbook today you will get them at a special rate. Don't wait, after June 20 the cookbook price will increase. We need to sell 100 cookbooks in order to begin making a profit. Come on get your one and only Love for Ashley, Recipes for Life Cookbook today.

For the last week or so, Ashley has been fighting what we thought was a cold. She was miserable with a runny nose, headache, sore throat but remarkably no fever. With Ashley we just can't give her any over-the-counter medications so we just had to watch her, make her blow her nose and force her to drink plenty of fluids. Today, I took Ashley to see her pediatrician after receiving a call from the school clinic saying that Ashley was complaining of a headache and she was in tears. The doctor said that Ashley was normal, normal but sick. It's wonderful to find out that your chronically ill child has a perfectly normal illness. Ashley has an allergy induced sinus infection. The funny thing is, Ashley doesn't have any known allergies except to Penicillin. We had Ashley tested for allergies last year and she was given the all-clear. Because I am the pushy mom that I am, I ordered the doctor to give me a script to have Ashley's blood work tested for allergies (she had

Ashley, My bright little green eyed girl. You are my beautiful strong and graceful princess. Imagining my life without you in it would be like imagining life without a smile and laughter. Having you as my daughter is what give my life meaning. I am so glad that God choose me to be your mom. As we experience the ups and downs of your life with liver disease, we are only reminded of how much your love means to us. Your love keeps us fighting for your life. There is a reason why God helped you survive this disease beyond the statistics and we are looking forward to finding out the answer to God's plan for your life. Ashley one of my favorite things to do with you is take you to dance classes, the time I have with you in the car alone is something I cherish. The conversations we have on those car rides are priceless. Sometimes our conversations are silly, sometimes they are serious talks about heaven, death and God but regardless of the topic, I am so glad that you want to share your t

Brad, You may be to old to allow mommy to kiss you in public but I hope you know how much I love you. Brad, being your mom is one of my proudest accomplishments. As I watch you grow from this big baby boy to this wonderful young man, I can't help but smile with pride. You have been one of my greatest joys in life. Reflecting on the 12 years that I have been your mom swells my heart with such love that I feel it might explode. Your laughter, your sense of humor, your love for your sister, your unconditional support of your friends means that I have done a wonderful job as your mother. You have become what I often tell my friends "every mother's dream." Sometimes I wonder why God gave you to me, why he trusted me to be your mom. As I was holding you the day you were born, I remember the immediate feeling of overwhelming love. I also remember thinking how am I going to take care of boy. I had no idea what to do with a boy since I had no brothers. Being a first time mom t

I truly believe that God put me on this planet to be a mom to Brad and Ashley. He knew that I would make a perfect mom to these two special children. I truly believe that being a mom is the one thing that I have done right in my life. To imagine my life without Brad and Ashley in it would mean not being able to imagine life. A few days ago my sister, Renee and I were talking about how much we love our children. She said, that she loves her children, Marisa and Chris, as much as she loves her husband, Aldon. Honestly, I don't remember how we got on the topic but I told her that I love Brad and Ashley more than Joey, my husband. Don't get me wrong Joey is my best friend but my children are my life. I would survive without Joey in my life, I am not so sure I would survive the loss of one of my children. When I was pregnant with Brad I remember thinking life doesn't get any better than this. After Brad was born I thought, life couldn't possibly get any better than this. The